Seasons of Stupid

(This post is brought to you by a two hour delay called after  I was already downing my second cup of coffee.  After I was already completely dressed and in "awake" mode.  After my 3 daughters were already awake.  But hey, at least the little man is still sleeping and we can have a laid back morning.  Right?  Right.  At least that's what I'm trying to cling to...it seems way more mature that being annoyed by the fact that I didn't know about the delay before I started rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.)

In my 30-something years of life, I've gone through what I refer to as Seasons of Stupid.  Times in my life where, as intelligent as I am, I've acted completely stupid.  I've either made stupid decisions, have reacted stupidly to other people's decisions or have been stupid enough to fight what God was trying to show me/teach me/do for me.  And that never  ends well.  Trust me.

Seasons of Stupid can end one of two ways...with me growing wiser in the long-run or with me being the poster child of the playground chant line "girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider."  Except I've never actually been to Jupiter...so I would have to insert a different location, but I think you get the point.  And in case you don't, I'll break it down for you:  I can either learn or not learn.  I can either become a better person or not.  I can either live forward with complete freedom, having experienced God's grace, or I can live in the past where bitterness and bondage control and increased numbers of Seasons of Stupid will surely evolve.  Sounds delightful, does it not?  That was sarcastic, FYI. 

"If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking."  James 1:5  (NLT)

"If you need wisdom..."  Don't we all at some point in time?  Isn't it OK to admit that?  Yes.  And yes.

"Ask our generous God..."  We have to ask Him.  Seems silly to point that out, except I am acutely aware that asking God for wisdom means opening ourselves up to the reality that His perspective may be different than ours.  So He needs to know that we're willing to step into that...and He will never force Himself on us.

"And He will give it to you..."  It's one of those things that we already know the answer to.  If we ask God for wisdom, He always gives it.  The end.  Case closed.  It's gonna happen.

"He will not rebuke you for asking..."  He's never, ever going to judge us for asking for more wisdom.  Again, may seem silly to point it out, but I do think that sometimes we try to water down our prayers in an effort to not come across so needy.  He's not going to resent us for asking for help.  And He knows us inside and out, so it's not like we can hide anything from Him anyway.

We all go through Seasons of Stupid in various shapes and sizes, large and small, when we're young and when we're not so young.  We've all been impacted by others' Seasons of Stupid of the same types of varieties...sometimes they violate the very core of how we see ourselves, and sometimes they (thankfully) remain at arms length.  God can take those seasons and use them to refine us.  To teach us.  And yes, even to bless us.  He's very good at taking the hand that we've dealt Him and doing amazing things with it...above and beyond our imagination and comprehension.  He's also a gentleman, and if we refuse to unclench our fists which grasp ever so tightly to our "crud," He will simply wait.  He won't pry our fingers open.  He will wait for us to loosen our hold, and to eventually hand it over to Him.  He knows full well that the longer that process takes, the more difficult it becomes and the more damage it creates.  And I do believe He will step in at times, as He sees fit.  But it seems as though He would much rather we do it His way willingly.

Perhaps you are like me.  You look back at Seasons of Stupid, whether yours or someone else's, and cringe.  You mourn.  You shrink.  You fear.  And if you are like me in that, I want to encourage you to add another verb to that list:  believe.  Believe that God will turn your ashes into beauty.  Believe that God adores and cherishes you.  Believe that He has plans to prosper you, not to harm you.  Believe that you are defined not by what you've done or what others have done, but Who has created you.

Perhaps you are like me in a different way: You crave wisdom in the way that you crave water after running a marathon in 90 degree temps.  As if your very life depends on it.  If you are like me in that way, I want to encourage you to ask.  With boldness and assurance and hope.  He will give it to you generously!

I find it interesting that later on in James chapter 5 we read verses which contain promises of blessings for those who weather tough stuff.  We read verses which point out the fact that all good and perfect gifts are from our Heavenly Father. We read this statement, which I love...

"And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession."

That's how He views us...as His prized possession.  No Season of Stupid will ever change that.  Likewise, no admittance that we need His help will ever change that.

You and I are the prize possession of the Creator of the Universe.  Go ahead...sink your teeth into that one.  Live vicariously through my two hour delay and take some extra time to let that roll around in your brain for awhile.  And then live out today like you believe it...because no situation, no person, no season and no amount of stupidity can take that away.  God will deal with anything that tries to come between us and that truth.  But that's His job.  Our job is to live forward with great hope and belief as we ask Him for the wisdom that we so desperately need, to take delight in the way that He answers that request and then choose to live according to the wisdom He grants us.

And though I complain, having some extra time to process this verse this morning was way better than having a few extra minutes of shut eye.  Bring on coffee refill number three...