Yes, I Remember

I lived on South Elkhart Street in Wakarusa, IN.

I had slept in that day. My daughter, Ashlyn, was only a few months old, and our sleeping schedule was pretty much up to her. Add to that the fact that neither Myron or I had typical jobs at the time (we owned a recording studio and I taught music lessons and worked at the Round Barn Theater at Amish Acres...rehearsals and shows were always in the evenings and afternoons), and our day to day schedules had the potential for being pretty laid back.

My parents had just moved out of town (to Anderson, IN) a few days after Ashlyn had been born, but Dad had been up for a visit.

That morning, Dad left early, before I was awake. Once I did get up, Myron made breakfast...a potato, egg, sweet pepper, cheese and onion concoction.

I finished eating and sat down on my blue rocking chair/recliner in the living room to feed Ashlyn. I turned on the TV. And I froze.

I remember thinking "I'm going to have to raise my child in a country that will be far different after today. How exactly am I going to do that?" I called my dad immediately, who was still on the road. He had been listening to the radio as he drove, as usual, so he was up-to-date on the attacks on the World Trade Center. Neither of us knew what to say to each other, but as a Daddy's girl...it sure was good to hear his voice. He told me to just keep watching while I could, and hold tightly to Ashlyn.

Which is what I did. Myron was in "action" mode...calling our church and various others to figure out how he could help. That's how he reacts to scenarios like that. He has to do something...a feeling many people had that day, though it was pretty near impossible to figure out exactly what that would look like. While he was doing his thing, I finally had to just stop watching. I played with Ashlyn. I held her while she napped (which wasn't typical). And I started calling my friends from the theater, as many of them were New Yorkers, to see if they were OK...if their families and friends were OK. Of course, they didn't know much, but it was nice for us to be able to talk to one another.

The days that followed were probably similar for many of us. Watching news. Praying. Calling loved ones. Trying to figure out what kind of impact this was going to have on our new realities. Feeling completely out of control. A feeling that was uncomfortable, and brought many of us to the point of realizing that there was more to life than the shallow surface "stuff" that we are all guilty of focusing on from time to time.

Many people turned toward God, realizing how badly they needed something bigger than themselves. Story upon story would prove that. Sadly, many turned away from God, disbelieving that a loving and compassionate God could ever let something like this happen. Tragedy, confusion, feelings of being out of control...they all tend to cause us to step to one side or the other of that "God is love" line.

As I remember 9/11, I obviously think of the lost lives and the friends and families impacted. I think of how everything in this country changed. I think a million thoughts that a million other people are thinking, that I don't feel really I need to repeat in this post. But most importantly, I think of how that day didn't take God by surprise.

He knew.

He prepared those who needed to be prepared.

He placed people where they needed to be placed.

He comforted those who would allow Him to.

And He mourned right alongside each and every one of us.

God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He will continue to know, prepare, place, comfort and mourn as we remember what this day held 8 years ago. And He will continue to do all those things as we face what the present day will bring us. Whether we see it coming or not.

So, yes, I remember. I remember where I was. I remember what I was doing. I remember the lives that were lost and those that were saved. I remember how things changed drastically. But I also remember that God showed up. And I hope that we all keep remembering that He will continue to show up. No matter what.